What if we can’t reach an agreement at mediation?

Although many matters are resolved at mediation, some couples are not able to reach an agreement. But there are other ways of resolving your dispute. If you are not able to reach an agreement at mediation you still have a few options:

1. Keep negotiating. For many couples who come out of mediation without an agreement they keep negotiating, usually with the assistance of their lawyers, and they manage to reach an agreement, sometimes months or years after the mediation. Mediation should be seen as the start of a negotiating process, not the end.
   
   
2. Try other methods of alternative dispute resolution. The other methods of alternative dispute resolution include:
   
   Collaboration
   
   In collaborative law each party works with a collaboratively trained lawyer to cooperatively resolve their legal, financial and emotional issues after separation without going to Court. The collaborative process offers a way to resolve separation disagreements with dignity and respect. Collaborative lawyers work together to shape an agreement making considered decisions for the benefit of the family as a whole. Collaborative practice focuses on resolving family law disputes with minimal conflict. Focusing on problem solving to reach a mutually acceptable settlement without Court proceedings, the collaborative process uses other professionals such as accountants, financial advisers, mediators and psychologists who provide professional advice.
   
   I am a trained collaborative lawyer.
   
   Arbitration
   
   As an alternative to court proceedings parties can agree to utilise the services of an arbitrator. An arbitrator is a qualified independent person who is experienced in family law. After hearing the matter the arbitrator will make an award which can be registered in the court and has the same effect as a court order. The award can be appealed but only in limited circumstances. Arbitration has the advantage that the parties can agree to vary the process to deal with the nature and complexity of the dispute. It is generally quicker and less expensive than court proceedings but does not suit some cases.
   
   
3. Apply to court. If you apply to court there are procedures which need to be followed. The court will impose deadlines and make directions to move the matter along through the court process towards a final hearing before a judge. Sometimes you need to apply to court to avoid further delay and to make the other party take action. But just because you apply to court doesn’t mean you can’t continue to negotiate or participate in mediation or arbitration. Statistics show that of all the applications to court only about 5% of cases will go to a final hearing before a judge. Many matters settle just before or even during a hearing.

If you go to mediation and don’t reach an agreement you shouldn’t feel it has been a waste of time and money. You shouldn’t feel pressured to reach an agreement at mediation because